Our time at the park goes something like this: I am always outnumbered, sometimes 2:1 and other times 3:1. Of course, my children don't always stay in the exact same area of the park, so I try to circulate and always have an eye on all of them as much as I can but I also don't have eyes on the back of my head, so that's not always possible. I do think of basketball defence quite regularly while at the park....I position myself so that I can see the ball and my check (I mean Mara and Davin). This means that I may not always be right beside them. I also check regularly on Jayna, but I'm not as worried about her and I know that she won't take off on me.
Here's where the judgement comes in. There is usually at least one mom at the park that is enjoying a 1:1 ratio (please note that I am not trying to bash parents who have one child, I am often very jealous of you). I find that those moms spend a lot of time watching me and my children. Of course my mind seems to think they are judging me because I can't see all three of my children at once and one of the little ones is probably climbing something that looks too big for them, but they've climbed it ten times before. I know some mothers are judging, based on their scowls and rare comments. I must admit that I am always jealous of these mothers. I remember the days when I could go to the park with Jayna and actually visit with a friend and not have to be "on watch" all the time. And when she was really little, I could follow her everywhere on the structure, which was never an option with the twins.
 |
| A rare moment when they are all in the same area! |
There have been a couple of quiet comments and some nasty looks when they watch Davin climb something (trust me I was amazed and what he can climb too, so if you don't know him and just look at his age, I understand) or watch him go down the slide at the Nature Playground by himself. Maybe I'm a little too laid back sometimes, but I do believe that children need to explore and learn their limits, while being in a safe environment. Children will never learn to do new things if they don't have the chance to try. I have watched both the little ones try to climb a ladder and they realize pretty quickly that they can't do it, which saves me telling them no.
I don't know why my mind automatically races to the judgement, when they may actually be admiring us. We are very fortunate to have three healthy little ones and they are pretty well behaved, for the most part. I have also been very impressed with how Mara and Davin have done at the park this summer. In the spring, Derrick and I were talking about how long of a summer it would be for me because I wouldn't be able to go to the park by myself with them. We would regularly go to the same playground in the spring and we realized that they were very comfortable there and never tried running away. I remember being at the playground and saying to Derrick that I thought I could do it by myself and he agreed. I'm so thankful that I am able to take them by myself, otherwise it would have been a looooong summer.
Another part of me is very happy that we have a boy/girl twins. I think there have been many times this summer where people don't realize they are twins because they think I have a daycare. I'm sure this has saved me many annoying and repetitive comments.
I think us as mothers tend to be pretty quick to judge others (myself included), when we should in fact be each other's biggest supporters. If you see another parent at the park and they are outnumbered, maybe lend a hand if you happen to be close by while their child goes flying down the slide.
No comments:
Post a Comment