The Park

We have spent a ton of time at various parks and playgrounds this summer and I must say I have never felt so judged.  I am not sure if this is reality or just my mind working over time and being hard on myself, like most moms are.  

Our time at the park goes something like this: I am always outnumbered, sometimes 2:1 and other times 3:1.  Of course, my children don't always stay in the exact same area of the park, so I try to circulate and always have an eye on all of them as much as I can but I also don't have eyes on the back of my head, so that's not always possible.  I do think of basketball defence quite regularly while at the park....I position myself so that I can see the ball and my check (I mean Mara and Davin).  This means that I may not always be right beside them.  I also check regularly on Jayna, but I'm not as worried about her and I know that she won't take off on me.  

Here's where the judgement comes in.  There is usually at least one mom at the park that is enjoying a 1:1 ratio (please note that I am not trying to bash parents who have one child, I am often very jealous of you).  I find that those moms spend a lot of time watching me and my children.  Of course my mind seems to think they are judging me because I can't see all three of my children at once and one of the little ones is probably climbing something that looks too big for them, but they've climbed it ten times before.  I know some mothers are judging, based on their scowls and rare comments.  I must admit that I am always jealous of these mothers.  I remember the days when I could go to the park with Jayna and actually visit with a friend and not have to be "on watch" all the time.  And when she was really little, I could follow her everywhere on the structure, which was never an option with the twins.  

A rare moment when they are all in the same area!

There have been a couple of quiet comments and some nasty looks when they watch Davin climb something (trust me I was amazed and what he can climb too, so if you don't know him and just look at his age, I understand) or watch him go down the slide at the Nature Playground by himself.  Maybe I'm a little too laid back sometimes, but I do believe that children need to explore and learn their limits, while being in a safe environment.  Children will never learn to do new things if they don't have the chance to try.  I have watched both the little ones try to climb a ladder and they realize pretty quickly that they can't do it, which saves me telling them no.  

I don't know why my mind automatically races to the judgement, when they may actually be admiring us.  We are very fortunate to have three healthy little ones and they are pretty well behaved, for the most part.  I have also been very impressed with how Mara and Davin have done at the park this summer.  In the spring, Derrick and I were talking about how long of a summer it would be for me because I wouldn't be able to go to the park by myself with them.  We would regularly go to the same playground in the spring and we realized that they were very comfortable there and never tried running away.  I remember being at the playground and saying to Derrick that I thought I could do it by myself and he agreed.  I'm so thankful that I am able to take them by myself, otherwise it would have been a looooong summer.  

Another part of me is very happy that we have a boy/girl twins.  I think there have been many times this summer where people don't realize they are twins because they think I have a daycare.  I'm sure this has saved me many annoying and repetitive comments.

I think us as mothers tend to be pretty quick to judge others (myself included), when we should in fact be each other's biggest supporters.  If you see another parent at the park and they are outnumbered, maybe lend a hand if you happen to be close by while their child goes flying down the slide.  

Summer

I know it's been a long while since I've written anything.  I've been meaning too, but I just haven't sat down to do it.  My mom asked me the other day if I was doing my blog anymore.  I said that I hadn't been, but I intended to get back to it, so here I am.

Jayna is pretty much three and a half now and the twins are almost 20 months old.  When people ask me how old they are, I am made to realize that they will be two in a couple of months.  I cannot believe that.

It was two years ago on July 14th that we found out the life altering news that we were expecting twins.  At that point, we were overwhelmed with the possible complications with twins, let along surviving the first two years!  I am very happy to say that we have almost made it.

It's been an interesting summer.  Jayna was in daycare full time (but I would keep her home regularly when we would do fun things) and the twins only went to daycare once a week.  Needless to say, I was reminded of the fact that I'm not cut out to be a stay at home mother.  Having said that, we have had a lot of fun this summer and spent a lot of time at playgrounds and at the zoo.  Many people have complained about the lack of heat, but it's been great for us.  I can't get to the beach or pool by myself with the three little ones, but I can take them to the park by myself so we've been happy.

We also took our first trip as a family of 5.  It was only a couple of days in Grand Forks, but we made it through with only one melt down in Gordman's with the two girls (really, that was the first tantrum in a store ever for our kids).  We did some shopping and the kids loved the water park so it was a definite success.  I wanted to camp this year, but Derrick was very reluctant.  His reason was that there would be some crazy moments.  My response was that there are crazy moments at home and if we were camping, at least we'd be making memories, despite the crazy moments.  I didn't push the issue this year, but next year we are definitely camping.  We did stay in a tent at a family function in Stonewall last weekend and it was a success, so that was promising and we are off to a friend's cabin for the long weekend, so that should be fun.

Jayna is becoming more and more independent every day.  She's an amazing big sister and usually a great helper around the house.  Obviously she has her moments, but for the most part, she's a really good kid who's always smiling and a lot of fun to be around.  She's also at the stage where she comes out with a lot of funny things.

Mara and Davin are busy, busy, busy.  I often find myself saying that they are crazy.  They are really well behaved (most of the time.....just like any child) and have pretty good manners, but they are at the stage where they scream because they can't communicate everything they would like to.  Davin is talking quite a bit and Mara is catching up.  Mara has recently discovered how to take dresses and shirts off, so that poses an interesting problem.  It's a lot of fun to watch them play together and on their own at this stage.  As I write this, Mara is being her little mom self, playing with a couple of dolls and stuffed animals and Davin is building with Mega Blocks, which he has recently discovered.  They do fight regularly throughout the day, but keep in mind that they are almost always together.  They also do really cute things like hold hands in the van and hug and kiss each other.  Those moments are unbelievably precious and make all of the yelling and screaming forgotten.

Here are some recent pictures.

A weekend of being a single mom

I actually wrote this on April 5th and was going to make changes, but didn't.  Here is the post.....a few months late.

Yet again, it's been a long time since I've posted anything.  Life has been crazy with coaching and working.  Basketball has been done for a few weeks now, so it's been nice to have more time with the family.  The thing I'm missing right now is spring!!!!!!

I keep saying that everyone in our house will be a lot happier once we can actually go outside.  I long for the days when we can feed the kids and then go for a walk or take a picnic to the park and have them play.  It's easy, yet good parenting and makes us all a whole lot more pleasant. 

Derrick is away this weekend in Calgary for his best friend's stag.  I'm definitely jealous of him being able to get away for the weekend and live the bachelor life (3 times in six months actually, must be nice!).  It's a good thing he has a great wife.

I'm planning on taking the kids to the zoo tomorrow.  I'm reallly hoping that the weather cooperates, otherwise I feel as though my house will be the zoo.  We will visit my parents tomorrow and take a friend up on their offer for dinner as well.  Sunday we will hang out with Derrick's family and then head home to get ready for the week.

The little ones will definitely be excited to see Derrick on Monday morning.  I will be excited to see him Sunday evening. 

On the topic of the kids, we have entered a new stage of crazy.  All three are running all over the house, stealing toys (sometimes sharing, which is cute), hitting each other, as well as wrestling (usually Davin and Jayna actually).  The girls have had some fun playing in the puddles.  Davin will not walk in shoes or boots.  We have tried shoes on in the house and he loses his mind.  This usually results in Mara wanting to wear them and then she runs around the house looking so proud.  On Easter weekend, Davin stayed planted in one spot for half an hour as Mara and Jayna played up and down the street.  We didn't realize until this moment that he was that stubborn. 

I'm hoping that I can now be more consistent in updating the blog as I do enjoy it!!