I spoke too soon

My last post was about how things were getting easier.  At that point, I was getting sleep and I felt like a brand new person.  I felt like I could tackle the world.  Since then, Davin has become a monster at night and I'm about to snap.  I just need sleep (although, finally last night was a little bit better).

Mara, on the other hand, has slept through the night for four nights.  No bottles and no soother!!!!  If there was ever a favourite, it's Mara right now.

While Davin's going through this brutal stage, I kept saying to Derrick that we have great babies (who aren't really little babies anymore), well that meant that they had to prove me wrong the last few days.  Usually, during the day they are happy as can be, but the last few days, not so much.  Not nearly enough sleep, paired with fussy kids during the day = one grumpy mom.

At one point, Jayna peed her pants on the stairs on her way up to the bathroom and I snapped.  I proceeded to yell, "What did I ever do to deserve this?"  As soon as the words came out of my mouth, I felt horrible.  Derrick and I are so fortunate to have three healthy and pretty happy children.

I know that I'm in a bit of a "funk" right now and it will pass.  I haven't felt like doing anything around the house lately, which in turn just makes things worse because there's so much to do.  I haven't been overly nice to Derrick, but I keep telling him we'll get through this and things will get better.  We have survived the craziest six months of our lives, I know we can make it through anything.

Last week didn't help all this as Derrick was in the emergency room on father's day and we found out he has a Hiatus Hernia.  Everything's fine, it just means there are some follow up appointments, medication, and trying to figure out how to control it so that his throat doesn't swell up again.  We also found out that Davin needs surgery in December.  He has what's called Hypospadius.  This means that what should be the urethral opening is actually just a pit and he actually has another hole a little lower down, which is functional.  I once again felt like a great mother when I found out that he had another hole that we didn't know about.  It's very small, but now it's glaringly obvious.  It's a common procedure, but no mother likes to have their child have surgery.  We will tackle that in December.

On a happy note, another milestone has happened.....the babies are officially sitters!!!  Here are a couple of pictures of them sitting in restaurant high chairs for the first time yesterday

I'm feeling like today will be a better day and maybe it's the end of the funk.  Hopefully Davin allows me to sleep a bit more and that will help.  Right now, Mara and Davin are being super cute in their high chairs right now....looking all lovingly at each other and holding hands!

Getting easier!

I have been saying now for the last week that things have been getting easier.

The twins have settled into more of a routine.  They eat at 8, 12, 4 and then 630, before bed.  They don't nap at exactly the same time every day, but I have a general idea of when they go down and I know what signs to watch for.

We have been quite frustrated with the twins' sleeping habits for the last few months.  I wasn't sure how much longer I could handle being up 4-10 times a night sticking soothers in and doing one feeding.  I'm happy to say that they are by no means perfect, but we took away the "dream feed" bottle, and they now sleep till about 1:30, get fed and then sleep till between 7 & 8.  They still fuss a couple of times a night some nights, but I think that may be due to teeth trying to make their way through.  I feel like a totally different person now that they are sleeping better.  I think that that's why this week has seemed so easy as well.  It's amazing what sleep can do for a person!

Davin and Mara are getting to be so much fun now.  They are happy babies and love watching what's going on.  We are now hitting a more challenging stage with Jayna as she thinks every toy in the house belongs to her.  I'm thinking that if this keeps up, I'm just going to take all the toys and put them in the twin's room and then Jayna can have no toys she can't share.  Jayna also loves playing with her brother and sister and she gets really close to them and they get excited, which means they kick their feet and pull her hair and she loses her mind.  "No Mara!!!  No Davin!!!"  are regularly yelled in our house now.

On another note of craziness.  I had someone over to talk about business this morning and while she was here, Jayna managed to miss the toilet somehow and pee all over the bathroom floor.  Later, she went to the bathroom in the big toilet.  She needs to use the stool to get up to the toilet.  Somehow, she managed to get some poop on the stool.  Of course, things tend to be a lot more normal when there isn't actually anyone here!

I took all three kids swimming this morning.  This was Mara and Davin's first time at the pool and they were awesome.  Thanks to a couple of friends for their help!!  I wouldn't have been able to do it otherwise.  Here's a picture of them after their swim.

Davin was tuckered out and fell asleep drinking his lunch time bottle in his high chair.  I went downstairs to do something quickly and came up to see him like this:

Hopefully the weather will cooperate and we will have a great weekend outside.

6 months already....really??

The saying, "the days are long, but the years are short" is never more true until you have children.  There are many days when I am just struggling to get through the day so that I can say I've survived another one.  Meanwhile, Derrick and I can now say we've survived six months!!!!!

I remember when Jayna hit the six month mark.  In the past, I had never noticed how quickly six months goes by.  You never really take note of a half year mark unless you have a child, or you're in junior high and you've managed to keep a girlfriend or boyfriend that long (in which case, it seems like 6 months has been an eternity).

It was six months ago yesterday when we got the call that would change our lives and make it more chaotic than we could ever imagine.  I had barely gotten off the phone with the nurse who was telling me to come in to get induced, and Derrick was already in the van and ready to leave without me.  I was taking my time because I knew that this was the end of our lives as we knew it.  I also had no idea what labour had in store for me and I was terrified about having an epidural and needing a C-section.  In the end, I can't complain about the labour and I didn't have a C-section!

Happy half year birthday my little man!

Happy half year birthday Mara Bean!

                                       


And of course, at 4:19 am on Monday December 5th, 2011, Mara Jade made her appearance in the world.  Davin Frederick just couldn't wait and he snuck in at 4:23 am.  We were very fortunate that they were both perfectly healthy and never had to go to the NICU.  At six months now, Mara is 28.25 inches long and 18 lbs 12 oz and Davin is 29 inches long and 20 lbs 11 oz.  They are working on learning new things every day.  Both babies are close to sitting up on their own, they both roll back to front (Davin more than Mara) and Mara popped her first tooth last Monday! They are both working on learning to grab food and actually get it to their mouth, as well as practicing drinking from sippy cups.  

Life is still crazy and I'm sure it always will be, just in an ever changing way.  I wouldn't change it for the world.  It is a bit easier now that the babies have a regular eating schedule and a somewhat regular nap schedule as well.

I love my babies and I'm enjoying watching them grow and seeing them develop their personalities, which are quite different.  I can only imagine how interesting the next six months will be.

Sleep....where art thou?

The babies were really great sleepers at the beginning, they would pretty much only wake up to feed.  Lately it's been a little rough with them, but things have been getting better.

Jayna on the other hand is a great sleeper.  Goes to sleep around 7:30 usually and wakes up around 7:00. If she wakes up in the night, something's wrong.  That is definitely a rarity, thank goodness.

Last night on the other hand, I don't even know what to say.  I noticed while Jayna was having her bath that she's getting her two year molars, but by her actions last night, you would have thought someone was murdering her.  She woke up constantly until 2:30 and was screaming.  We have let her cry it out in the past and have also done a bit with the babies, but this was by far the worst experience.  We know that this is not normal for her at all and now she can talk and call our names, which is especially heart breaking.  

All I wanted to do was sleep.  It's the most frustrating feeling.  After hours of trying, Jayna finally fell asleep for the night around 2:30 and then the babies were up at 3:45 (thanks to Derrick for waking me, because I didn't hear them) to eat.  After that, I was able to sleep till 7:30!

Here's to a day full of coffee and trying really hard to be patient!!!!  Hopefully tonight all three kids will cooperate in the sleep department.  One night is all I'm asking for right now.

Rough day

Yesterday was not a good day.  It went a little something like this:

Jayna peed all over the floor (which is really unlike her at this point) in the morning.

We were going out later and I wanted to bake muffins.  Of course, this means she must help me but on this particular occasion, she was doing everything possible to drive me crazy and not listen.

I put the babies down for a nap in the morning and Davin napped for maybe half an hour and then proceeded to do nothing but scream for the next hour, no matter where he was.  Mara also joined in on the screaming once she was awake.

I didn't shower the day before, so I had to shower on this day.  By the time I got around to it, both babies were screaming and Jayna kept banging on the door the entire time.  Just when I thought I could escape it all for 5 minutes.  I was also hoping to blow dry my hair and put on mascara, but that just didn't happen.  Thank goodness putting on a bit of jewellery makes you feel a lot better.

Where we were going involved a really short walk so I needed to put the twins in the stroller.  Of course, this means that Jayna must follow me outside as well.  This makes a 1 minutes job become at least 5 or 6 minutes, all the while both babies are still screaming inside.  Because Mara and Davin were so cranky, I didn't even put socks or jackets on them.  It's a good thing they were dressed earlier in the day, otherwise they would have gone in their pjs.  It was chilly out, but it's only a two minute walk and I put a blanket on them.  I still feel like a terrible mother, but I didn't want to deal with them anymore.

When we get home from our visit, I'm looking forward to quiet time.  The babies cooperated, but Jayna definitely didn't.  She threw a fit and then continued to play in her room for a bit.  At one point, I heard a weird noise, but chose to ignore it....I will later find out what this noise was.  When Jayna tells me she needs to go potty, I open the door to find her topless.  She has never taken off a shirt by herself before so this caught me off guard.

Jayna gets out of her bedroom and heads to the bathroom.  I went back to the living room, because she can do this on her own.  She later comes out with an item that I'm sure I put up on a shelf above the toilet and she can't reach that high.  I decide to investigate and I find her stool next to the toilet and the lid is down.  Clearly she has climbed onto the toilet to get what she wanted.  I ask her if she went pee, she says "yes toilet".  I then notice that she did use the real toilet and not the little potty.  By this, I mean there is pee on the floor, on the toilet seat, and her stool.  Another clean up job.

Jayna comes out to play and starts moving furniture round in my living room.  I didn't even ask her to stop because I am really not int he mood to deal with it at this point.  It'll take me two seconds to put it back once she gets bored of this activity.

Derrick gets home from work and I'm about to take Jayna to the park for a bit.  I go into her room to get socks for her and I now discover what that weird noise was earlier during her "quiet time" in her bedroom.  Jayna used another stool to reach on top of her dresser and dump the entire container of fish food into the fish tank, on her dresser and the floor.  I notice the fish floating at the top of the tank, but thank goodness he moved once I banged the tank.  I don't particularly like cleaning the tank to begin with and this is a huge mess, which I don't need.  I was not very nice and needless to say, Jayna didn't get to go to the park.

On a happy note.  I went out and finished planting my flowers, (which I'm sure died last night due to frost, I'm so annoyed) and Jayna came out and "helped" me.  It was nice to have a positive moment with her to end the day.

Another cute moment yesterday.  Jayna helped herself to Derrick's hockey gear.

Thanks to Supper Central, we had a yummy, but easy dinner!

The best thing of all was that all the kids were in bed by 7:15 and then Derrick and I poured some wine and ate dinner.  Then we actually talked.  It was like a date, but we didn't leave the house or need a babysitter.  It was very nice.  I think we'll be doing that a lot more often.
end day with all kids in bed by 7 and dinner date with my hubby, no kids while we eat dinner and drink wine and we didn't even need a babysitter!

I do look forward to the babies sleeping better at night so that I have a lot more patience during the day.  I'm not the most patient person to begin with, so this does not help.  Mara and Davin are settling into a better sleep pattern, but we still have a bit of a ways to go.  Here's to hoping this changes soon.  Everyone in our house will be happier!

Stupid things people say

I found this posted on the MBFOM Facebook group the other day and totally laughed when I read it.  For most of the comments, I could sympathize as my twins are only closing in on 6 months, but we're out and about a lot and I get these questions all the time.  I have added my own commentary in bold beside the original article.

Parents of twins face a special brand of stupid comments, delightfully all their own. Three friends, all moms of twins, recently gave me some keen insight from the frontlines. I've compiled their comments into a special list:

The Top 15 Stupid Things People Say to Parents of Twins
15. "I could never do it." (Oh really. What would you do? Are you suggesting I put them on the curb with signs around their necks that say, "Free to a good home. My mom can't do it"?)  On a day like today, I think putting the kids on the curb is a good idea.  Oh yeah, and if I don't do it, I'll have CFS breathing down my neck.  My world isn't perfect and neither are my children, but we get by every day and sometimes we even have a lot of fun.

14. "Do they have different personalities?" (No. They are the same human being divided into two parts.)  

13. Said by a stranger, "They're identical, right?" Mom answers, "No. They're fraternal." Stranger response, "They are NOT!" (OK. You're right. I have no idea what I'm talking about. These are not my children. I thought it would be fun to borrow them from a mom down at Baby Gap. It's been more than an hour. I guess I should return them.)  

12. "Are they 'paternal' twins?" (Yes. They have a father. There was only one virgin birth.)

11. "Just wait till they're older. It only gets harder." (Thank you. I woke up this morning hoping I'd receive a word of discouragement while pushing a cart of preschoolers down the cereal aisle.)  I find this one funny, because every mother of multiples has told me that it gets easier.  I'm pretty sure you're not living my life right now and you actually have no clue how hard it currently is so mind your own business.

10. "When one cries, does he wake the other?" (No. Twins cannot hear each other's cries because they all communicate with their special telepathic language only.)  We are actually lucky in this regard, although we get the question regularly.  The babies usually sleep through the other one crying and they share a room.

9. From a perfect stranger: "Were they in the same sac?" (Hello. Nice to meet you, too. Will you be sharing your gynecological history with me as well?) 

8. "Are they developmentally behind?" (Well, let's see. They're 3 years old and thus far, all their graduate school applications have been denied. We'll get back with you on that.)  If someone ever asks me this, they will regret it.  

7. "How do you do it?" (Haven't you seen the Nike commercials?)  My response is, "You just do.  You don't have a choice."  If you don't....see #1 about CFS.

6. Said by a dentist: "I was shocked that they didn't have the same bite patterns." (They are two different human beings, not clones.)

5. "You must be so busy." (Are you volunteering to clean my house?)  Nope, all I do during the day is sit around and drink coffee and eat bon bons.  This is usually said to me while I'm shopping and I usually want to answer by saying, "Yes I am, now can you please leave me alone?  I'm shopping with three kids two and under and I don't know when the shit is going to hit the fan."

4. Said to a mom of fraternal twins who are different sizes, have different eye color and different face structure: "How do you tell them apart?" (I just look at them.)   For me, mine are also different genders so if I was really that confused, which I'm not because they look so different, I would just open the diaper.  

3. "What do you do when they both cry at the same time?" (Sometimes I cry. Sometimes I go to Starbucks.)  Sometimes I ignore them.  I also realize that I cannot meet the needs of three children at the same time all the time so sometimes someone is unhappy.  For the most part, they are good though.

2. Said to a mom of boy/girl twins: "Are they identical?" (Uh. Not exactly.)  This is my most frustrating one.  Usually after I've just said it's a boy and a girl (or Mara is clearly dressed in pink and Davin in a boy outfit), they ask me if they're identical.  I bite my tongue and say no, but what I really want to say is, "take a second and think about what you just said."  I'm sure if I said that they would think and then I would see the look on their face as they realized what a stupid question this was. 

1. Only one comment could be voted No. 1. The choice was clear. Drum roll, please. After a stranger had been informed that the toddler boys were twins, she asked a simple question: "Are they brothers?" (Enough said.)  I haven't had anything quite that stupid, but I do get asked if Davin and Mara are twins all the time.  I feel like telling them that I didn't have enough on my plate with a two year old and a baby, so I thought I'd borrow someone else's baby to go do my shopping with.  I may be crazy, but not that crazy.

Let's be honest. People are fascinated with twins. They don't mean to say stupid things. It just happens. It happens to all of us. Saying stupid things is one activity that joins us all together as human beings. Learn to forgive the frailties of others and enjoy the laughs later. Life is a journey. Enjoy the double-stroller roller coaster ride! 

Once again, this is unrelated, but I will include these cute pictures to remind me of the good times while I'm having a bad day.  

I'm surprised people still visit

After a visit like today, which was quite normal actually, I'm surprised I still have friends who want to visit with my children and I.

Today my friend came over with her little baby and Jayna didn't nap, which isn't the end of the world, but it usually means that there will be a moment when she has a crazy melt down.  Thank goodness today's meltdown wasn't actually all that bad.  She was being a little annoying so I put a movie on for her downstairs.  Of course she only stayed down there for about 10 minutes, only to return upstairs to be even more annoying.  This finished with her winding up to hit her brother, which I was close enough to stop and then carry her to her room.  I returned to the living room with my friend and we chatted over top of the screams and Jayna banging on the door.  After she calmed down, she played in the room a bit and then returned and was fine.

A little while later, the twins started wailing at the same time and my friend was holding her sleeping baby and laughing.  I don't blame her and if I was in her shoes, I probably would have run out of the house.  I decided it was time to feed the babies and Davin was so tired that he was fussing the whole time, meanwhile Jayna was being way too quiet in the bathroom.  She had already come out once and asked me to unbutton her pants and returned once she was finished to pull her pants up.  Jayna finally came out of the bathroom with a bunch of lotion on her hands and wanted me to rub it in for her.  Apparently I don't look busy enough while I'm feeding two babies and one is still crying.

Despite not wanting to, I helped Jayna, only to have her return to the bathroom.  Sometimes I choose to ignore the fact that she's too quiet because it's easier in the moment when I'm busy, although I sit there and wonder about what I'm going to have to deal with later.  Without me saying anything, my friend got up and caught Jayna playing with the lotion again and now she had an even bigger blob of it on her hands.  Needless to say, I've now put the lotion up too high for her to reach (as well as the scissors, but that's another story).

As I write this, Jayna is playing quietly downstairs, but I'll wait for Derrick to come home to discover what she's been up to!

When people come to our place or we go visit, I think they realize just how chaotic our world is, but I'm happy that they can laugh it off and like us enough that we are welcomed back.  I'm sure this will change once the twins are running around!

This is unrelated, but this video makes me laugh.  We really didn't spend any time teaching Jayna this, but here is a video of her karate moves